This passage starts with a puzzling exchange about the lawfulness of divocrce. To understand this debate we have to go back to Moses on the mountain with God. This is where the Lord gave Moses the ten commandments, and explained the law to him. The books of Exodus and Leviticus tell the story of how the Law was given to Moses and how it was eventually written down. This is the complete and perfect law of God. What some dont know is that Deuteronomy, was a “second telling” of the law…, that is what the name of the book actually means “second telling”.
The sad thing about the “second telling” is that there are differences between the first and second tellings of the law. For example, things like genocidal warfare, profane sacrifices, interest on loans and divorce were allowed “temporarily” in the second telling of the law that were not permitted in the first. The reason that they were allowed was because of the grumbling and sinfullness of the Jews, and the effort of Moses to placate the noisy complainers for a time, but was never intended to be a permanent change, or a roadmap for future reforms.
To make this point further, at the end of dueteronomy, right before Moses dies, and the jews cross the jordan river to enter into the promised land, Moses says that this second telling of the law is the law and not one jot or tittle shall be changed or aborogated from that time on. And he was very serious, but the jews that came after him felt that they knew better, and the law was altered and debated over and over, during the centuries that would follow.
The point of debate in todays reading was an ongoing discussion between two of the most famous of rabbi’s Shamai, and Hillel. They both felt like divorce was allowed under the law of Moses, and they both agreed that it was only the husband that could give the bill of divorce to the wife, but they disaggreed on the justification… Shammai felt that it can only be allowed in the case of an act of adultery by the wife. Hillel believed that it could be allowed for any shameful act by the wife, and what was considered shameful was loosly interpreted.
So that brings us to today’s reading. The Pharisees, as they regularly do, are trying to set a trap for Jesus. If Jesus was to say it is allowed it would have caused Him trouble with the orthodox jews and with his disciples because it would make him look like a liberal reformer and a hypocrit. If he were to say that it is not allowed it would get him introuble with Herod who would kill anyone that challenged his divorce. But Jesus, as he does, turn the tables on them and reminds them of the “first” telling of the law, and that Moses allowed it (in the second telling) only because of the jews hardness of hearts. Jesus here is reminding them of God’s original plan for marriage, and at the same time reminding them that it was their sinfull nature that forced Moses to reform Gods law after the fact. And in God’s original plan, marriage was for life and not to be separated by man.
God’s plan for marriage is a union of not only two persons, but more importantly, of two souls. How is this so? Anyone that has ever been married knows that this is hard, and does not always seem like love. But the bond of marriage, is bigger than just two “I do’s,” it is a bond that is unlike any other. The Church teaches that the sacrament of marriage is the only sacrament where the priest is only a witness. In the sacrament of marriage the husband confers the sacrament on his wife, and the wife confers the sacrament on her husband, the rest of the people present are just witnessing a miracle that God is about to perform. This relationship is a singular choice to give everything that you are, completely and totally, to this one person, and to receive everything that they are completely and totally in return.
Our friendships with others can be very close, and even at times very intimate, but they dont get even close to approximating the closeness that is found in marriage. Friendship is also a choice, but it is not a complete and total gift of self, like is given in marriage. Some part of yourself is reserved from being given to our friends. Family is also not the same. We do not have a choice with who our family is. And while we can be close with them it is not always a free choice because we have obligations to our family that we dont have with others in our lives. Marriage stands alone as a unique and special relationship in our lives.
This relationship is unique among all relationships that you will find in this world, because it is more than a relationship it is a covenant, a new creation in this world, a new creation established by God. This is why divorce is such a devastating thing. When two people are bonded in marriage, joined together as one flesh, they are no longer individuals, but one spirit one body and one soul. To separate that union is like splitting the body in half, tearing flesh from flesh. That is why God said that “what God has joined together, no human being must separate.” It is just too painful, and it destroys something created by God.
St Lucia, the seer of the vision of our Lady of Fatima, said that the last battle fought between God and the Devil would be over the Family. And right now it seems like the Devil is winning. But it is only a battle, and we know who wins in the end, but it does not mean that there will not be great pain and suffering, before that final end comes.
For those who are divorced or getting a divorce right now, my heart goes out to you, but I urge you to do whatever you can to turn back from that ultimate end. For those that are happily married, you must use your marriage to be a billboard for what marriage can be, show the world and all of its bitter and jaded people that it is possible and can become a source of great joy. But do not ever let the devil and his minions tell you that it is a antiquated institution and not for this time.
A good marriage is the greatest thing that a person can hope to acheive while in this world, and at the same time the greatest source of joy we will ever find. But even more it is the way that we come to understand the love, that God offers to us in the trinity. This is the love that He invites us into as well, and the love that we are all called and destined to have with God in heaven. It is a foretaste of heaven, but it is a foretaste that we can experience and enjoy while here on earth. It is a joy, and it should be the goal of all of our lives. My wish is that all will be able to have the grace of a good marriage.
